sometimes i wonder if i have become too screwed up from reading too many magazines. the kind that lead you warily on many different paths. the kind that advise you to be picky. then to not be too picky. then to settle for nothing less than fireworks. then to be realistic about your expectations. on some level, i suppose i just want someone who will get me.
sometimes it seems like we are always on the lookout for something other than what we need. but lately i have been reminded that it is the simple things that mean the most.
yesterday at pi and ejay's wedding, i was sitting beside charles and kaye and i was mildly amused to see them holding hands during the ceremony. and i thought how nice it must be to have someone to hold hands with.
when i was in hawaii last year, i saw my cousin and her husband quietly hold hands when they thought no one was looking. and even though i saw many public displays of affection on their part and even heard some very poorly disguised dirty talk (haha), i have never seen them more in love than at that moment when they were holding hands in the dark.
there may be a lot of things that i am afraid to believe in at the moment, but sometimes i wonder if it is not too bad to allow my heart to hope for these two things: someone who will get me, and someone who will want to hold my hand.
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