schemes

...lately, everyone's got them.

loys has a scheme to get employed in a SPED school in the US.

gail has a scheme to get herself into UK in the next 3 years.

k has a scheme to further herself into the government world by taking MPA.

deng, chely, and ais all have schemes to gain financial independence.

i want a scheme to get myself out of the hell that our house has become.

things running on my mind now:

1) being fat does not mean you stop being an actual person, and repeatedly telling someone that you are becoming "disgustingly fat" to your face does not make it any easier to take.

2) how much money will i get if i pawn all the jewelry i own, and how far will it take me?

3) just because i followed orders all my life does not mean that i have to continue doing so.

4) not following orders is not necessarily wrong.

5) i wish i had started disappointing my parents earlier on so that they would not have expected too much of me.

6) why should i be afraid of failure when i am already scraping the bottom of the barrel?

7) sometimes the friends you have stop being what they are to you, no matter how badly you want things to stay the same.

8) not making mistakes is the biggest mistake you could ever make.

9) i've just stopped believing.