para akong napadpad sa ibang planeta sa pagsali ko sa 3E.
coming from a block that has an entirely different dynamic (kailangan magpush-ups bago pumasok!), and with the majority of the boys being highly religious (*read: sa loob ang kulo hihihihi), save for the overtly bastos hehehe (you know who you are), i survived 2 years of law without having gone through ten million innuendos from my guy blockmates.
that all changed coming into E. hehehe. boys are funny and openly...well...guys. i wont name who they are (so they can still pursue hapless, clueless females running amuck in the college of law), but here are a few of the choice tidbits i got while waiting for our succession class to begin.
---------------------------------------------
while reading men's health magazine
guy 1: pare, ano kaya ang meron si vic sotto noh, pano niya nakuha si pia guanio?
girl 1: siguro malaki yung ano niya.
guy 2: wala yun kay dolphy pare
guy 1: ah si dolphy may bolitas yun
me: ano ang bolitas?
guy 2 proceeds to draw something on my very clean notebook. *eyes widen. i just had to ask. i still don't understand what they are, but at this rate, i figure i should just shut up.
guy 3: what do you have against penises?
me: nothing, i just dont want them in my notebook.
guy 3: bakit maganda ba ang notes mo?
me: oo naman! pangit ang sulat ko pero kumpleto yan!
guy 3: mali, wala ka naman notes eh. *insert evil laugh.
me: oh shucks.
speaking of notes...
guy 1: pare, ang ayos ng sulat mo ah! right handed ka ba?
guy 2: sometimes. *insert evil grin.
------i tune out guy talk of sex scandals----------------
but i can't.
guy 1: pare ayoko ng sex scandals
guy 2: bakit naman?
guy 1: gusto ko nasasabi ko yung pangalan hehehe.
guy 2: pare narinig mo na ba yung rule na pag nagka-girlfriend ka bawal ka na raw mag ...(gestures. imaginine niyo na lang)
guy 1: what? that's a stupid rule.
guy 2: oo nga pare. first love never dies (looks lovingly at his 2 hands.)
eeeeeeeeeewwwwwwwwww.
-----------------
sometime in the middle of Balane's discussion he manages to insert these innuendos, courtesy of the legendary Johnny Carson
Johnny Carson talking to the wife of some golfer dude
Johnny: what do you do to inspire your husband before he plays an important game?
Wife: I kiss his balls for good luck.
Johnny: That must make his club stand straighter!
Johnny Carson interviewing Racquel Welch, who brought her pet cat along for the interview
Johnny: So you really love cats, eh?
Racquel: Yes, would you like to stroke my pussy?
Johnny: Sure, why don't you get that darned cat off your lap, and I will!
*and a random statement from Balane before the class ended:
"People who fall asleep with sex problems in their heads wake up with the solution in their hands."
all the boys applaud of course. hehehe
But the winner hirit came from Mr. Reyes, when being asked questions in French by Professor Balane
Professor Balane: french french french french french?
Mr Reyes: I'm sorry sir, the only French word I know is...si.
hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha.
but for the cruelest joke of all...Wala si DANGAT (in the dark these letters arrange themselves to form the word VOLDEMORT). hihihihi.
happy happy joy joy
No comments:
Post a Comment